Mental Health

  • 15 Ways to Help You Clear the Negative Energy from Your Home

    Just like the people around us, places too, carry their own energy. Our homes should be a space filled with positive and abundant energy, and one way to make sure it does is to take active steps to clear the negative or stagnant energies away.

    Negative energy was a contributing factor to my depression and while I’m for the time being trapped in my current space it’s imperative that I take measures to ensure the space around me keeps my vibes on the up and up.

    So how do you know if your home has negative energy? For me, I know it’s time to clear the energy when I start to feel overly exhausted, can’t think straight, have headaches, I’m snapping at others or just don’t overall feel well. You know that strange feeling that doesn’t sit right and you can’t pinpoint the why or the cause – that’s negative energy.

    Now the most important question, how do you clear the negative energy from your home? There are a number of ways to do this and depending on your mood you can do one or a combination of many, it’s truly up to you.

    Open Your Windows

    Clear the Negative Energy from your Home

    Opening your doors and windows will allow the fresh air to flow into the rooms of your house. Stale air not only traps negative energy inside it can also make your home feel stuffy and suffocating. Regardless of the season I always have my windows open. You’d be amazed at how quickly your mood will change from sluggish to energized by simply allowing a breeze to blow into your home.

    Clear The Clutter

    There’s a different kind of energy that comes with decluttering your home. A good decluttering will leave you feeling refreshed, accomplished, and positive. Clearing the clutter and letting go of things that you don’t use can remove all those emotional and mental blocks, and invite more opportunities your way.

    Get a House Plant

    There are some plants that have the power to attract positive energy. However, before you head out and buy any ole plant you should know there are some plants that attract negative energy. Take, for instance, cactus. Due to their thorns, it’s best to avoid this plant if you’re trying to bring positive energy into your home. Here is a list of plants that bring positivity as well as other forms of abundance.

    Burn Candle Or Incense

    Clear the Negative Energy from your Home

    I am a candle lover so this is an easy one for me. Burning a candle or incense can restore the balance in your surroundings, which can be exceptionally helpful especially after you’ve arrived home after a rough day out or have had negative encounters taking place in your home. In ancient times, incense was burned to not only change a room’s fragrance and religious practices but to also ward off evil spirits.

    Smudge Your House

    Clear the Negative Energy from your Home

    This is a Native American tradition in which you burn herbs as a means to clear the negative energy from your home. How do you smudge your space? You hold the stick over a fireproof bowl which will collect the ash that falls as you smudge. You don’t want those small ambers hitting the floor and possibly causing a fire. With your smudging stick in hand move and lit move your arm in a clockwise motion starting from the entry point. You will continue this motion throughout the entire room while making sure to focus on the corners where negative energy can be stagnant. You can smudge your home once a week, once a month, or every six months the choice is up to you, smudge when you feel it’s time.

    Repair and Remove Items

    Raise your hand if your guilty of holding on to things that are broken and you swear you’re going to fix it but you know you never will? Yeah, me too. Hoarding broken or damaged items and keeping them in your home invites negative energies, and clutter. If something gets chipped or broken fix it right then and there if you can and if you can’t ask yourself if it’s something you really need to keep. If not, let it go. As for your other things, be sure to look after them and clean them regularly as dust can prevent the circulation of positive energies.

    Rearrange Your Furniture

    Rearranging every so often is a perfect way to breathe new life into your home. Your new furniture placement should give you positive vibes and renewed happiness. If your space is small or shaped in such a way that you can’t move certain things around go for smaller things like chairs or other decor items.

    Salt Power

    Clear the Negative Energy from your Home

    Salt is believed to be a powerful agent specifically when it comes to cleansing your home. If you find yourself stuck with negative thoughts and emotions, consider soaking in a salt bath for some time. Another great idea is to sprinkle sea salt over all 4 corners of your space and let it sit for 48 hours before sweeping it up. You can also put the salt in water, let it sit, and using your fingers or small brush rub it on various surfaces in your home. The salt will help absorb any negative energies in your room and cleanses it in ways you can’t see.

    Bathroom Matters

    Your bathroom also plays an important role in determining the quality of energies in your home, after all this is where you’re taking your salt baths. So when not in use, make sure the toilet lid is always shut and the bathroom is always clean and fresh.

    Use Essential Oils

    When I feel out of sorts the first thing I do is turn on my diffuser, add a few drops of lavender essential oils, and in no time I feel more calm and relaxed. It’s this feeling why so many rely on a variety of these oils to lift their spirits and put them in a better mood. I’m  Here is a list of essential oils that will remove negative energy. I’m also a huge fan of Saje’s Goddess natural perfume with gemstone rollerball. I keep it handy and when I’m feeling overwhelmed I apply it to my pressure points to help me relax.

    Place Crystals Around Your Home

    Clear the Negative Energy from your Home

    For many, crystals are used for spiritual and healing purposes when worn, held or placed in strategic places throughout their homes. It is believed that crystals connect with our auras and depending on which one(s) you have they will help ward off bad energy, act as a stress reliever, and improve our overall health. Here is a list of stones that will keep negative energy away.

    Do Yoga and/or Meditate

    clear negative energy from your home

    Nothing gets your mind, body, and spirit in a better mood than by doing a little yoga and meditation. Negative energy loves it when you’re lazy so by doing some yoga you’ll get your blood circulating and your body will feel re-energized. But if you want to remain in a stationary position, you can meditate. During meditation, you are setting clear intentions of happiness and to do this you can chant a mantra that will release negative thoughts and vibes from your mind and environment.

    The Power of Sound

    A super effective way to break the stagnant and bad energies in your home is sound. I’ve got three ways that you can use sound to clear the negative energy from your home.

    Sound Bowls

    Himalayan or Tibetan singing bowls create a relaxing and stress-free environment. You can include it in your meditation and yoga sessions or as a stand-alone as you walk through your home. How do you use a sound bowl? Take the small mallet and press is against the rim of the bowl in a circular motion until you hear a solid clear tone. You can also tap the outside of the bowl before and/or after the circular motion to signify the start or conclusion of your session.

    Ring a Bell

    Another way to break the stagnant and bad energies in your home is to ring a bell three times in each corner. Doing this can almost instantly revive the space, and also help attract more abundant energies.

    Put On Some Music

    You’ll become more cheerful with a renewed sense of energy you didn’t know you had when you put on music. I have a number of playlists on Spotify with all different kinds of music from pop to old school, but whatever your taste or mood music is the remedy to rid yourself of negative energy.

    Decorate Your Home In Positivity

    When decorating your home add objects that will invoke happiness. My little corner home office is an explosion of happiness and calm for me. I have images and phrases that put me at ease when I sit at my desk. This is what you have to do for your home. Add as little or as much as you would like until it feels just right and switch them out often to keep the vibe fresh.

    Hang A Mirror

    Mirrors do more than give a room depth they also reflect light making the area brighter which will combat negative energy. For mirrors to be effective make sure they’re framed and not cracked as sharp edges are considered negative energy. Also, be sure to keep them clean allowing as to allow as much light as possible to be reflected.

    I hope these tips are helpful to you. In addition, I’ve compiled some items that will help you clear the negative energy from your home.

    1. Art of the Root Purification 8oz Soy Herbal Candle for Negativity
    2. Aura and Reiki Crystal Protection Mist (smudge alternative)
    3. MAMA WUNDERBAR Smudge Kit
    4. Levoit Kana Pink Himalayan Crystal Salt Rock Lamp
    5. Beverly Oaks Charged Black Tourmaline Crystal Complete Kit
    6. Protection Spells
    7. Tibetan Meditation Yoga Singing Bowl Set
    8. Rose Gold Modern Circle Mirror

    What are some of the ways that you clear the negative energy from your home?
  • How Group Chat Love & Support Helps Me Fight Depression

    group chat mommyrandr valerie pierre

    In a previous post, I talked about my struggle with depression and how my goal for the year is to inject happiness into my life. I mentioned things that I’m doing to help keep my depression at bay. But there was one thing I didn’t talk about because I wanted to dedicate an entire post to it, and that’s the group chat.

    I cannot tell you how much the group chat saved my sanity.

    I don’t know if you realize this, but the group chat is more than a place to shoot the shit and share memes. This is an ultimate safe space for everyone in it to bare your souls in exchange for genuine love and support. Think about when you’re having a moment with your man, job, or life where’s the first place you go? The chat.

    In other words, group chat is group therapy.

    This is where I would go to unleash my feelings without fear of judgment. I could just express something that’s irking me and a short time later there are my girls chiming in reassuring me shit is gonna be alright. Or sometimes I wouldn’t get a response right away, cause folks got lives and shit to do, but I still felt better cause I was no longer holding on to those emotions. That ‘send’ button was the release I needed. It helped me go on about my day. Yeah, I’d still be somewhat in whatever feelings I was in but it didn’t consume me and weigh me down.

    This is what makes the group chat so damn important. It lets you know you aren’t going through shit alone. Cause this is how depression can make you feel. Alone. It can take you to that dark ugly lonely places inside you and slowly eat away. But I knew I would be fine cause I had women who would be there to support me. And even though I’m notoriously private when it comes to my emotions I find comfort in having a sacred place to release those emotions with no worry of judgment. Which is what I (and most people) fear the most, judgment.

    This is how I’ve been able to survive

    Now don’t get it twisted, group chat support isn’t a one-way street. This isn’t about me dumping my problems and emotions on my friends and them being my support rock. No. This is about us being a rock for each other. The same loving support they give me is given right back to them in their time of need.

    And let me be clear, the group chat isn’t all somber and sadness. Oh, fuck no. We have a good time in there. Aside from jokes and shit, we give each other work tips, motivate and keep one another accountable for goals we’ve set, big each other up when we’ve done awesome work, and reassure when we’re doubtful. It’s pretty lit in there and I’m proud and lucky as shit to have a little private corner of the innanets that’s just for us.

    Do you have a group chat? Does it help you get through those difficult moments?
  • Happiness Is My 2019 Word of the Year – It’s Time to Remove My Mask

    word of the year happiness valerie pierre mommyrandr

    My word for 2019 is happiness.

    I have a confession to make and it’s gonna shock the shit outta you. Are you ready? Okay, here goes – I’m not happy. I honestly don’t remember the last time I was truly happy. I know you see me all jokey n’ shit but most days it’s just a mask.

    I’ve been faking the funk and it’s taking a toll on me, and I’m tired y’all.

    I’m. Fucking. Tired.

    What’s making me unhappy?

    Honestly speaking, it’s my home life. Specifically, where I live and who I live with. No, it’s not Jeff and the kids. You see, I live with my in-laws and the clash of age, culture, and common sense leaves me wanting to scream. But instead of fighting yet another battle I know I’ll never win, (cause common sense never prevails) I bottle it up, keep quiet and go on about my day. That is until I boil over and start taking my frustrations out on those closest to me – Jeff and the kids. If I could afford to visit my therapist I’m pretty sure she would diagnose me with some form of depression. That’s how bad it is.

    How do I know? Cause like most people with an internet connection I looked up depression on WebMD and I found that I suffer from 10 out of 13 symptoms. Some of which include: fatigue, feeling hopeless, trouble concentrating, and irritability to name a few. I can go through a range of emotions that leave me feeling just plain out of it. I feel trapped within the walls of my body and the walls of this house, and I need to break free but there’s no place to break free to.

    How long have I been wearing a mask?

    Who the hell knows, but I know the mask has gotten thicker and right now it’s so heavy I can hardly hold my head up. So much so, it’s causing a number of issues hence the reason for my new year’s health and wellness goals. I’m sick of existing like this. I need to make a change and fast.

    How the hell do I find my happiness?

    The most obvious thing is to move. We know this and we’ve been working on it. Trust me. Our new goal, come hell or high water is to be out by the end of the school semester. But in the meantime, another obvious place to look for happiness is within me.

    I hear a lot of people talking about speaking things into existence. Well, here’s another truth bomb, privately I’ve been speaking very negatively about everything in my life. So how can I expect the universe to give me any positivity when I haven’t put any out in the world? It took a long time for me to understand that I control my happiness.

    My problem was I was pointing fingers at those around me for the cause of my misery. I cannot look for others to give me something that only I can give myself. I also can’t expect Jeff to add my happiness to his to-do list. He’s got enough shit to deal with as provider for our family. I need to get my ass on a white horse and save myself.

    word of the year happiness valerie pierre mommyrandr

    After some research I’ve found six ways I can start bringing happiness back into my life:

    Wake up with positivity

    The first thing I’ve started telling myself when I wake up is, “Today is gonna be a great day.” or “I’m gonna get a lot done today.”  These positive affirmations set the tone for the day. If I’m thinking and speaking positively there’s no room for me dwell on the negative.

    Be grateful

    This is a biggie. One, while I complain about where I live and with whom I need to be grateful I have a place to live. Others aren’t so fortunate. Two, I’m not living here alone. I have Jeff and the kids. They should be my only focus and I need to enjoy spending time with them and not worrying about the other people I live with.

    Go back to therapy

    Therapy can be expensive. Those co-pays add up. But I need to go at least once a month to talk to someone about my thoughts and feelings. Keeping them bottled up is no way to live and it’s not fair to my family to emotionally unload on them. And if I can’t get to therapy I need to open myself more to Jeff in a way that’s not offputting so that we both can get things off of our chests and work on a solution together.

    Update my vision board

    I’ve had the same vision board for at least 5 years. I look at it every day but I don’t really look at it. Which is why I’m gonna toss it and start anew. I’ve already started flipping through old mags and I see I’m more drawn to visuals that invoke happiness and serenity. I’m going to decorate my work area with peaceful imagery as a way to surround myself with happiness.

    Do things that I love

    I’ve gotten into the habit of making time for things and people that bring me joy. I love ending my day reading an article or book chapter, going to meditation on Friday mornings, and spending Sunday’s in bed with Jeff watching Netflix. These things help me find the inner peace I need in order to make it through the week.

    Celebrate achievements

    No matter how big or how small all achievements need to be celebrated. Like cleaning out the boxes of crap in the closet, Jeff getting a job in a new career, our 10 year wedding anniversary, Sierra receiving glowing remarks from all her teachers, and Lil’ Jeff’s speech improvements. This also includes daily achievements like the kids cleaning their room or putting laundry away. It’s all about keeping it positive.

    Choosing happiness for my word of the year was an easy choice. The moment the word hit me I and started seeing how the word made me feel I knew it was the right decision. And these are things I’m going to stop doing once we move? No. I’m going to keep doing them cause no matter where we go it’s important that I’m living my happiest life.

    What are you doing to ensure your happiness this year? What’s your word for the year?
  • Holiday Stress Got You Down? Here Are Five Easy Ways to Manage It

    holiday stress valerie pierre mommyrandr

    The holiday season is upon us, and with it comes holiday stress. For many people, that means dealing with a lot more stress than usual. You’re planning/attending holiday dinners, getting gifts for everyone, keeping the kids occupied on winter vacation, and of course your in-laws. If you like yours consider yourself lucky for one less stress in your life. For the rest of us, their visit cannot end fast enough.

    The point is, the holidays can be overwhelming on top of the challenges you face each day making it easy to feel stretched too thin. Fortunately, there are things you can do to minimize the stress.

    Here are five ways to manage holiday stress:

    Don’t be afraid to say no

    If you don’t want to cook, host a holiday party or can’t do something cause you don’t have the time, then don’t. If that perfect gift puts a strain on your bank account, don’t feel obligated to spend money you don’t have. Instead look for something else that’s within your budget range. The point is, saying no will save your sanity and finances in the long run.

    Take time for yourself

    Having some alone time gives you a chance to slow down, catch your breath, and think about something besides everything that needs to be done for the holidays. Read a book, go for a walk, craft or watch a movie. The important thing is that you do something YOU enjoy.

    Make a list of everything you need to do starting with the most important

    Planners and to-lists will help you stay organized and keep up with everything much easier. If you see there is more to do than you can handle, you’ll have time to recruit some help instead of stressing over how you will take care of it all. If you don’t have a to-do list or a 2019 planner you can get one here.

    Be realistic and don’t set impossible goals

    Volunteering to cook dinner for the family, bake holiday cookies for the office party, and taking care of all the shopping may seem like a good idea. However, trying to actually do all of this shit may prove to be way too stressful.

    Get some exercise

    Exercising helps to clear your mind and improve your overall mood. You’ll also feel more energetic so go jogging, workout at home or go to the gym. If you can’t make it to the gym, no worries. Take some time to yourself and give these health and wellness podcasts a listen.

    Do you have any tips that help you manage holiday stress? Share in the comments below.