self-care

  • I Ain’t Doing Sh*t For National Lazy Mom Day, And Neither Should You!

    The moment I found out National Lazy Mom Day was a thing, I knew I was gonna go balls to the wall to celebrate it. And by balls to the wall, I mean,

    I’ve been a mom for a number of years and this is the first I’m hearing of this holiday. Which is quite disappointing if you ask me. But I know about it now and this is why I’m sharing it with you – cause if I didn’t know you probably didn’t know about it either.

    National Lazy Mom Day takes place annually on the first Friday of September

    I don’t know who created it but I’m sure it was an overworked underappreciated mom in the south or midwest fresh off summer vacation. This woman no doubt needs a statue erected in her honor. Honestly, this holiday should happen on the first Friday of every month, but I guess I would be asking for too much.

    The only drag about it is I’m on the east coast and my kids don’t go back to school until after Labor Day. This is why I said this person has to be in the south or midwest as their kids are already back in school. So, that said, I have to work around my kids still being on summer break to enjoy this national day of rest.

    Here’s a to-list of things I will be doing in celebration:

    That’s right. Nothing.

    Since my kids are home I have to make adjustments, and that’s cool. I’ll take what I can get. My plan is to spend the beginning part of the day doing absolutely nothing. Due to Jeff’s work schedule, I can take the entire morning to myself. He leaves for work in the afternoon so that gives me several hours to myself. Then in the afternoon, it’ll be me and the kids. It’s not much but it’s something. And sometimes that little something is just enough to get us feeling good.

    So why should moms do nothing on National Lazy Mom Day? The answer is simple,

    We do everything year-round.

    Full stop.

    And, because we do everything here are some guilt-free things you can do right from home (preferably from bed) to celebrate:

    National Lazy Mom Day mommyrandr

    Ditch those chores

    You better bust out the paper plates and cups and call it a day, and leave the laundry till the day after. There is no reason why you should be doing anything around the house. This also includes cooking. It’s Friday, make it a pizza night.

    Binge-watch a series

    This is your time to dive into a series you’ve been meaning to watch but never had the time. With all the streaming platforms available you’ll have no shortage of finding something new and exciting to dive into. Or when all else fails just leave it on I.D. Channel all day.

    Take a nap

    For those of you with kids still on summer break I know it’s hard but it is possible, especially if your kids are older. Have your partner or sitter take the kids out for the afternoon while you stay home and get some zzzs. If your kids are younger you can ask a grandparent, aunt or uncle, or even a friend to come over to keep an eye on them while you close your eyes.

    Read a book

    Here’s your chance to catch up on that book you’ve been meaning to read or continue reading. What’s the point of hoarding all of those books you have if you’re not gonna read them? That’s a rhetorical question.

    Remember, you don’t have to overthink celebrating. Just enjoy the day doing the least amount of responsibility. If you don’t have a whole day to spend doing anything. Here are 30 self-care activities you can do in an hour.

    Have you ever heard of National Lazy Mom Day? How are you celebrating it?

  • 30 Mommy Me Time Activities You Can Do in One Hour: Sponsored by Armitron

    This post is sponsored by Armitron. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

    If there is one thing I cannot stress enough and it’s the importance of taking time for yourself. Why is it so important? Because the time we spend alone with ourselves improves our physical and mental health. Without moments to ourselves it’s only a matter of time before we become less focused, short tempered in addition to feeling tired and overworked.

    So what exactly is keeping moms from taking  time that they so desperately need and deserve? The answer is simple. Time.  It’s the one thing moms truly don’t have enough of.  Time is something we talk about and say we’re going to take for ourselves, yet the lack of hours in a day prevents us enjoying life’s simplest pleasures. Taking time for oneself is a task that is truly easier said than done.

    I know this from personal experience as I cannot tell you how many weekends since January I said I was going to the spa. I can tell you it’s more than a dozen. How many times did I make it there? None. I made it zero times.  But that’s not surprising. Moms all over, myself included, find it increasing difficult to even carve out the smallest amount of time for themselves. Oh yes, I struggle with it just like you. And it’s quite understandable. We have jobs (in and out of the home), homes to care for,  kids to care for, PTA meetings, after school extracurricular activities, etc. Hectic work/home schedules always leaves little room for mom to have time to herself.

    So I decided to  take a stand. Two weeks ago I opened my calendar and went to the first weekend that I was free and marked a day for myself. Nothing and no one would stop me. I shared this plan with my friend Allaya. She loved the idea and asked to tag along.  Excitement was in the air!

    But the burning question looming over us was, what would we do once we were out of the house? It didn’t take long for us to blow up our chat with things to do once we flew the coop. Then we thought about it – not all moms have hours to themselves. What if they only have an hour. What could they do in 60 minutes that would make them feel good? Our list is below:

    30 THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH AN HOUR OF FREE TIME

    Mani/Pedi
    Visit an ice cream shop
    Rent a paddle boat in the park
    Go for a walk/run
    Get a facial/massage
    Go for a drive
    Walk the bridges
    Take a yoga class
    Get a wash and blowout
    Take a class relating to a hobby
    Do arts and crafts
    Take a paint/wine class
    Go thrift shopping
    Lay with pets at the pet shop
    Go to a happy hour
    Get a makeover at Sephora
    Get a wax
    Rent a Citibike
    Have sex
    Take a long hot bath
    Visit a girlfriend
    People watching at the park
    Have a picnic
    Go to the library to check out free books
    Go to the bookstore to buy books
    Play video/board games
    Go to Target alone
    Watch Netflix/HULU
    Take a nap
    Bake yourself a cake

    When the day came for our big day out we had no clue as to what we were going to do, but we had a starting point from our list. Curfews don’t exist for us but our Armitron watches would keep us from staying out too late. That’s the best thing about watches, you don’t realize you need on til you have one on. Yeah we have our phones but when you’re trying to disconnect watches are the key. Armitron has a wide variety of watches that are perfect for every type of mom time adventure. They have sporty watches for moms who are seeking active time like fitness classes or swimming, casual watches for days you want to grab a bite with friends, and diamond accented watches for very special occasions such as a date night with your partner.

    armitron watches

     

    armitron watches
    Armitron Sporty
    armitron watches
    Armitron Casual

    I filmed our entire adventure so you can see what you can do on your own (or with a friend) with at least one hour of time to yourself.

    The next day despite us being out so late we felt great! And while we didn’t do all 30 it was still mission accomplished. When I woke up the next day I felt renewed and less stressed. Little annoyances around the house from the kids and the husband didn’t bug me like they did two days before. My internal rejuvenation clock was reset and I was ready to tackle on whatever the day had in store for me.

    The after feeling of doing something that is just for you is why mom time is so important. I encourage all moms to open their calendars and pick a  day just for you. Go out alone or tell a friend, spend one hour or several alone the choice is yours. But the choice to not do it is non-negotiable as your happiness and health depend on it.

    Oh, by the way if you need a sitter so that you can take the time I’m giving you $35 (the equivalent of an hour and a half) towards a sitter from Urbansitter. This is for first time sign ups only. See now you’ve really got no excuse. Have fun!

    *To shop the watches shown in this post visit Armitron online or at your nearest department store.

  • 5 Ways You Can Take Care of Yourself as a Stay at Home Parent

    Taking care of yourself as a stay at home parent is extremely important for yourself, as well as your children. When you have a kid, your life may seem like it revolves around your child, and on some level, it does. Because of that, you may forget to take care of yourself or worse you find your self-questioning why you should, and that’s never a good thing.

    Here are some ways you can take care of yourself as a stay at home parent.

    Go to bed at a decent time, and give yourself 6-8 hours of sleep

    stay at home parent valerie pierre mommyrandr

    Your sleep is important. While it’s best to sleep 8 hours, sometimes, as a parent, you’ll be faced with times that you might strain snooze at least hours. Allowing yourself enough rest, allows you to focus on taking care of your kids, and running your household well.

    During the times you might not be lucky enough to get even 6 hours of sleep, try a short nap. If you have small children that do a nap time, you could also utilize that time to take your own nap.

    Make sure to eat at least 3 meals a day

    stay at home parent valerie pierre mommyrandr

    Your health is just as important as your child’s health. Making sure to eat 3 meal a day keeps your energy up so you can keep up with your kid, or for some parents, multiple children. It’s really easy to skip a meal when times get hectic. Missing a meal could leave you dizzy or not performing up to your normal self.

    Take an hour each day to do an activity that would be considered good exercise

    stay at home parent valerie pierre mommyrandr

    Exercise can help keep you in shape. If you’re stuck at home, you can do simple things like floor exercises or walk around the neighborhood, especially if you cannot afford to purchase a gym membership. And while the weather is still summery there’s still time to take advantage of these summertime activities.

    If you can, try delegating tasks to reduce stress and don’t overwork yourself

    stay at home parent valerie pierre mommyrandr

    It takes a lot to run a household and also raise children. If you’re married, try involving your spouse in helping out when your schedule is busy. If you have a child that is old enough for some chores, assign them some tasks.

    Never overwork yourself. It’s okay to want to be the super parent, but sometimes, a little help can reduce your stress, and also, later allow time for family fun. Don’t be afraid or feel embarrassed to ask for help.

    Try a leisure activity at least once a week that you can enjoy without the kids

    stay at home parent valerie pierre mommyrandr

    You can’t always be cooped up in your house, and you can’t allow your children to be attached at the hip. Getting a babysitter from time to time will allow you to have a little bit of time to yourself. And if planned with enough time you can hook up with a friend or two and make it a girls afternoon or night.

    For a married couple, this is important, as it allows you to fit in a date night, and keep the relationship from being strained.

    Are you a parent that is always at home with the kids? What ways do you take care of yourself?
  • 7 Things You Can Do Today That Will Make You a Happier Mom

    happier mom valerie pierre mommyrandr

    Motherhood is hard as fuck. Like, seriously hard. There are days we love it, and then there the days we wanna run away. Does that equate to us not loving our children? Nah. We love them to the moon and back, but there are days when our kids’ antics causes us to want to wanna scream bloody murder.

    You know those days, when the hitting, lack of sharing, yelling, and so on that just won’t stop. I know it’s just not my house. It had better not be just my house. But seriously, it’s in these moments when our happiness tank starts to deplete, along with our patience, we think about those kid-free days and how we wish we could go back to that for five minutes. Oh, let me just point out that it’s perfectly okay to admit that you think this way sometimes. We’re human. There’s nothing wrong with reminiscing about the life and freedoms you once had. It’s completely normal.

    Now the question is when we feel less than our usual selves what do we need to do to make sure our happiness meter is set somewhere between “kids are finally sleeping” and “it’s wine time!”?

    Stop trying to be the “perfect” mom

    Let me state this out the gate – there is no such thing as a perfect mom. I don’t care what the media, celebrities or that sanctimonious mom at your kids PTA tries to sell you, don’t buy it. It’s not true. There is no rulebook for parenting. We’re all out here trying to do the best we can for our families with what we have. Which is why I hate the term “perfect” mom because it’s wielded in such a way to make moms feel inadequate and self-conscious. No one should ever feel that way about themselves. That’s why it’s important to remind ourselves as often as possible that we’re fine just the way we are.

    Stop comparing yourself to other moms

    A lot of women will look at other moms who they think have it together, and wish they could be like them. When the truth of the matter is, they don’t have their shit together either. They’re struggling just like the rest of us, but they don’t let you know that. It’s all about perception. But know, that’s all it is. This all reverts back to the need some moms feel like they have to be perfect to be considered a good parent to those on the outside looking in. Just enjoy being you without the pressures of trying to be someone else.

    Ask for help

    If you need your partner to get the kids ready for bath time bed so that you can watch the last few moments of your favorite show, finish a blog post or something that’s for you, ask them. They won’t know you need it unless you do so. And please, don’t judge their methods over yours. Let your partner do it their way. And if you have family and friends in your corner, ask them as well. Now should you have no one to turn to for help, look into a hiring a part-time sitter. Someone whom your kids can hang with every now and then so you can take a breath. No mom should ever feel like she’s alone.

    Slow down

    Ask yourself, is it really necessary for you to have a full schedule for yourself and your family? Do you even like these activities? Is anyone fully committed to them? If you answered yes to one of those last two questions, or both, then why are you doing them? Cut back on things that you have little interest in. This way you can make the time for things you really like and always wanted to do, or maybe to do nothing at all. Running at 100mph every day is no good for anyone, and the effects of it will take a toll on your physical and mental health. Pace yourself before your wear yourself so thin your body slows down for you.

    Get as much rest as you can

    Getting enough sleep is crucial for anyone to survive. You can’t function at the level you need to complete a 15+ hour day when you’re running on 3 or 4 hours of sleep from the night before or worse from several nights in a row. Staying up well after the kids have gone to sleep is tempting because the house is quiet but it can backfire on you if you do it constantly. So how do you get more sleep? Give yourself two hours after the kids have gone to bed then call it a night. And you can also alternate who sleeps in on the weekend. Saturday is my day to sleep in and Sunday belongs to the man. And here’s another tip, if you’re kids are still in the napping stage, when they sleep you should be sleeping too. Why are you up moving around? Get on the couch and chill out. If your kids are out of that stage, like mine, then make them go in their room for “chill out” time. This is the time where everyone retreats to their room for one hour. Sometimes kids will nap (yes!) other times they won’t (boo!) but hey, at least you were able to rest yourself for a bit of time.

    Let it go

    This will be hard for some, but stop getting worked up over shit that’s out of your control. You can’t do anything about it so instead of walking around aggravated about it be like Elsa and let it go. Take a breath and know that things will be okay and continue on with your day. If things aren’t going to be okay, phone a friend to talk about it. Sometimes just talking to a friend and hearing their reassurances are enough to get us through those dark times.

    Have all of the sex

    Everyone knows the longer you go without the sex the angrier you become. So do tha do as often as you can. And if you don’t have anyone to have sex with, have sex with yourself. Now if you and your partner are going through a stale period in your bedroom here are some tips to help you out.

    Do you have any tips that have helped you become a happier mom? Share in the comments below.